Joel pressed his face against the wired fence, staring into the dirty and overgrown fields beyond. Its appeal stemmed not from its appearance, but what it stood for. It represented the freedom that Joel had longed for. The sunlight, freedom and the care from all our family and friends are a complete contrast to what Joel was experiencing now. The world seemed to be so dark and gloomy for him. He was just like a caged bird, cooped up and getting weaker day by day.
He would not have landed in this plight if he had thought before he acted. Joel was convicted due to eating drugs, although he vehemently denied. Few years back, Joel was a talented and wealthy man, who caught the admiration of many young girls. Many offered to be his friend and never once would anybody see him alone! Never did he know that it was that bunch of ‘good friends’ that had led him to what he was now.
One day, after work, he received a call from one of his friends, Ah Chye, that he had something special to show him! As the curiosity in him rose, he agreed. As they met, Ah Chye then out of the blue, asked him if he was very stressed up with his work. Without a single clue to what Ah Chye was saying, Joel then answered honestly. Would a person whose picture was always on the headlines feel stressed? Upon answering, only to see Ah Chye digging into his pocket with a small white packet in his hands.
“Brother, on account of our relationship, I shall give this to you for free.” Ah Chye said. As he handed the plastic over to Joel, Joel got the shock of his life! It was ecstasy! Ah Chye then told him to lower down his voice. Joel could not believe it! Why did his friend, Ah Chye, do such a thing? He then stuffed the packet into Ah Chye’s hand.
As he was about to walk away, Ah Chye and his friends called him back, saying that if he were to not eat them, he would be deemed as a coward and they would go around framing Joel that he had taken drugs. Imagine what the media would write.
Joel then stopped in his tracks and seemed to be dazed for a while. He knew that he had no choice! It was either that he betray himself, but not alert anyone or being framed and making it to the headlines.
In the spur of the moment, he then succumbed to peer pressure. He snatched the pill from Ah Chye’s hand and popped it into his mouth. It was only at that moment that he saw Ah Chye and his friends running away as fast as they could. Without knowing what had happened, he looked around and saw a group of policemen approaching him. He knew that he had to run! However, could a person outrun six policemen?
Handcuffs were soon snapped onto his wrists after checking that he had taken drugs. Tears trickled down his cheecks as he knew that all his right future was destroyed with just one pill!
The unlocking of the prison gate soon awoke him and it was this time in which Joel regained his freedom. He stepped out, soon blinded by the warm rays of the radient sun and a few familiar faces approached him. This long awaited day had finally arrived! Choked with tears of happiness, Joel then told himself that he would start life afresh and never again would he let a pill control his freedom. Staring back at the old and dilapidated prison cell, Joel then swore to himself that he would never be back here agan.
Word count: 625
Joy starts her compo with a powerful and captivating introduction, describing the sight of the dirty field outside the prison. The protagonist sees more than just an overgrown field, he sees his future in what lies beyond the prison fence. This is a good method to bring across how someone sees something beyond its appearance and in life, this is what we truly need to be looking out for.
Notice how her plot is similar to many others who wrote about freedom. 2 people can write the same plot but the difference in them is how they bring their ideas and emotions across to the reader.
A powerful introduction and conclusion is what you need to convince the reader that you’re worthy of high marks no matter how simple or cliche your storyline is.
Good work, Joy!
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